Vietnamese Cultural Etiquette: What Not to Do

Vietnam is one of the most welcoming countries in Asia, and the people are forgiving of tourists doing dumb things. But there are a few cultural norms that, if broken, will mark you as a thoughtless foreigner rather than a curious guest. This is the list.

The big ones

1. Don't touch anyone on the head

This is Southeast Asia universal. The head is sacred in Buddhist thinking. Patting children on the head, even affectionately, is a no.

2. Don't point your feet at people or images of Buddha

Feet are the lowest, dirtiest part of the body. Crossing your legs in a way that points your foot at a person, altar, or monk is rude. In temples, sit with feet tucked behind you or cross-legged.

3. Remove shoes when entering homes and some temples

Shoes come off at the door of any home, most homestays, and many pagodas. There will be a pile of shoes at the entrance. Take yours off and add to the pile. The line is "shoes stay outside the clean space."

4. Don't touch monks (especially women touching monks)

Monks are not to be touched by women. If a woman needs to hand something to a monk, she places it on the ground or on a cloth for him to pick up. Photos of you standing next to a monk are also a no unless he initiates.

5. Use both hands when giving or receiving

Money, business cards, gifts, change. Both hands, or right hand supported under by the left wrist. The single-hand-handoff reads as dismissive or rude.

6. Don't lose your temper in public

Vietnamese culture prizes the composed face. Raising your voice at a vendor, a taxi driver, or a waiter will mark you as someone who "doesn't have education" — a damning judgment. The polite-but-firm approach works 100x better.

Food and drink

Don't stick your chopsticks upright in rice. This is funeral imagery. Lay them across the bowl.

Pour for others before yourself. When drinking with Vietnamese people, you pour for the elder, then your peer, then yourself. The recipient holds the glass with both hands and tilts it slightly below the pourer's.

If invited to a home meal, bring fruit, sweets, or beer. A small gift, not an expensive one. Don't bring white flowers (funerals) or sharp objects (cutting the relationship).

"Mời" (invite) and "Cảm ơn" (thank you) are the only two words you really need.

Temples and pagodas

Shoulders and knees covered. Shoes off. No photos during ceremonies. Don't turn your back to the main Buddha — angle your body sideways. Don't touch statues or offerings.

What to do when you mess up

Smile, say "xin lỗi" (sorry), and try to do it right next time. The Vietnamese generally appreciate the attempt far more than the perfection. The worst thing you can do is be defensive about your mistake.